shoutout to everyone making progress that no one recognized because you never let anyone see your darkest moments. i see you and i am so, so proud of every little step you’re making in the right direction.
Reminder: I know people preach positive outlooks and happiness, but you don’t have to be positive about everything all the time. It’s important to express yourself, all your feelings and emotions. Don’t push things under the rug/hide things in favor of being “positive.”
Stop telling yourself that the grass is greener on the other side, because it’s not. It is greener where you water it. So take control of your life and start watering your own pastures and grow your own greener grasses.
Stop both envying your neighbor’s green grass AND watering your own. We’re in a fucking drought. You can’t sustain that shit. Think beyond the lawn that society told you to want. Put in some native plants that will thrive and bloom with very little water. They might be a little more spiny than what you first planned, but there is great beauty and variety in these hardy survivors. Your yard will be way more interesting and friendly to wildlife than that of the people who took the easy route and poured on water at the expense of other people and organisms. (This has been a California-themed post hijacking.)
No but like along with being literal good advice (GRASS AND LAWNS ARE A TERRIBLE IDEA WE SHOULD REVERSE THIS CULTURAL EXPECTATION NOW) this is also metaphorically good advice (as I’m sure you knew when you posted it).
There are sometimes things that you take for granted that you are just Expected To Want or Do or Be that you don’t actually have to. You’re so used to it you don’t even think about it, but the moment you do a less resource-heavy alternative appears.
On an environmentally friendly level this is a terrible example, but a couple years ago I was talking with my therapist about problems I was having being a functioning human being, and I went on a rant about the dishes and how they stress me out and I feel like I never get them done and then I hate myself and after listening to this whole rant I expected my therapist to give me the normal pep talks about being kind to yourself and taking it on a little bit at a time but instead he just had the most exasperated look on his face and he said,
“Buy some paper plates.”
He said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world and I was completely speechlessly thunderstruck.
He said, “As an environmentalist, I am giving you permission for your own health to buy some paper plates. Problem solved.”
I don’t always use paper plates now. My mental health does allow me to keep up with the dishes better than I was (though these days my physical health has started interfering). But when I feel that slipping? I skip the cultural expectation that I should just be doing the dishes all the time. I conserve my (metaphorical, the opposite of literal in this case, sadly) water, and I buy some paper plates.
There a thing that’s ruining your mental health? Your life? It feels like a simple thing that other people can just DO, but you can’t? Often there’s a simpler solution. If you are tired of taking care of your hair, cut it into a pixie cut to save yourself the hassle. Hell, shave it off. You don’t need hair! Google hangout is a great alternative to going out when you want to talk to a friend but aren’t sure you can get yourself out of your house. If food stresses you out, buy shit you can just grab and eat without even having to microwave (I fucking love cottage cheese and vegetables for this exact reason).
You do not have to cook. You don’t have to date or get married. You don’t have to be monogamous if you do want to date or get married. You don’t have to be straight. You don’t have to be a boy or a girl. You don’t have to look a certain way or talk a certain way or eat certain things. You don’t have to go to college. You don’t have to be in that major. You don’t have to own a house. You don’t have to want or have kids. You don’t have to wait for the perfect partner to have kids if you do want them.
It’s such a normal thing to have a lawn that many people don’t even consider the time, money, and water it would save to just get rid of it and replace it with an alternative that takes into account the native environment of where it’s growing. How much easier their life would be without maintaining something that just went there because it was expected with no regard for whether it naturally fit, and instead put in plants that serve the same function but actually thrive and take root with no real effort.
Instead of fighting to maintain expectations, throw away your lawn and plant natively instead. Both literally and metaphorically.
whenever you need urgent change in your environment and feel like the need to like… move away (and it’s not a result of your physical safety being in danger), you can do simple things and that can help that feeling of monotony that’s a result of repetitive urban/suburban at bay:
– change your phone background and screensaver
– get a cheap new phone case
– change your ringtone
– change your desktop background
– get a new toothbrush
– buy a new lipstick
– take a walk
– try a new drink flavor
Heya~ I know finals are coming up so please remember to keep yourself healthy!
As for ways to relieve school related stress: -Drink water not coffee. I know its tempting but coffee won’t help you/your body. -Get to bed at a reasonable hour: I know its hard when you have all your finals for all your tough classes on the same day but don’t over work yourself. Go to bed on time and see about waking up earlier to get some last moment reviews in before the test. -Try to eat something Healthy when you’re hungry: Being fed will help you process things (rather than thinking about food) and you will have the energy to keep studying. Protein bars make for good snacks! -Try to break up your study periods using the Pomodoro method: 45 min studying, 15 min break. Use the break time to get up out of your chair, stretch, go to the bathroom, refill your water bottle, grab a snack, text your friends back, find the next thing to work on. -Try not to procrastinate studying. Even just a little bit every night helps! (I personally love flash cards and will use them for anything i could.)
Non-School related ways to relieve stress: -Go for a walk outside in the sunshine. No classes, no books, just go outside and BE outside. -If you have room try some gentle Yoga (or try this when you go outside!) -Listen to some relaxing music -Take a hot shower/bath(here’s some Bath Magic for you!) -Some Anti Axiety/stress Spells -Talk to someone about it! ❤ I’m always here if you need/want to vent!
You’re almost done! Hang in there anon! You can do this!
Food is just food and doesn’t have a natural mealtime. This is especially important to remember when you’re dealing with mental illness that makes it hard to eat.
When I’m in a down swing with my depression, I forget to eat/don’t feel like eating. When I do get around to eating, often the only thing I want is something like pancakes, or milk, or apple sauce. And of course it’s 6pm and I feel lame for eating ‘breakfast’ foods. Or it’s 8am and I want fried chicken, and feel like a terrible person for eating dinner at 8 in the morning.
But food is just food. We assign certain foods to certain times of day culturally, but it’s not a biological thing. Your body can digest pizza at 9 in the morning and yogurt at 11pm. Are you eating food? Yes? Then great! It doesn’t matter what ‘kind’ of food you’re eating, as long as you’re nourishing that body of yours. It’s ok to have cheap ramen for breakfast if that’s all you can stand to eat. That’s ok–you ate food today!! That’s a major accomplishment when you’re dealing with an illness that tries to stop you from doing everyday person things. (Especially if you’re recovering from an eating disorder.)
Don’t feel bad if you eat rice for breakfast or muffins for dinner. Food is just food.
on days where you’re in pain and seemingly haunted by shadows and overcast thoughts, be gentle and overtly kind to yourself. remember moments where you’ve felt unbridled bliss, with cotton candy and honey coursing through your veins as dripping golden skies illuminated your wondrous, bright life. one day, you’ll embrace that warmth and pure joy time and time again. take small steps, be patient and embrace your kaleidoscope of emotions, tending to them whether they are brimming with dark hues or coated in light. take care, balance and bloom.
ImagineCreateDevour 
