i wanna be a reverse tooth fairy where i rob people and then scatter human teeth on their bed
a dentist
i dont know what your dentist is doing to you but i think you need to go to the police
Tag: funny
this tank top makes my boobs look so amazing I just walked into a door because I was distracted by my own cleavage good morning everyone
its 8:30 at night
This post is 2 months old but it’s nice to see you can tell the time that’s a very good skill to have mate
physically im here but mentally im always in a cave home off the coast of greece eating pomegranates and drinking fresh juice but it’s whatever
me: *see rude or cold character*
me: aaaww he’s my cinnamon roll
bro: do u mean thiS FCKIN KILLER
me: I KNOW HIS SOUL IS LOST AND SENSITIVE
helpimbeingchasedbywaltwhitman:
I miss my girlfriend. I mean, I don’t have a girlfriend, but like, hypothetically, I miss her.
If you don’t have a massive alternative universe in your head with developed people and stories you’re lying.
mine is embarrassingly massive
I have generations, alternate dimensions, and spin offs.
I’m a celebrity in my mind
I have at least ten. Depends on what kind of day I had, which one I think of at night.
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Awe I love this, makes me feel less weird and alone, let’s meet up in our made up alternate universes
Passive mode
Active mode
YO ON SOME ANIME SHIT THIS DOPE AF!!!!
Some loser: Wrestling is fake
Me: Explain THIS
Loser: Holy shiti’m so delighted that tumblr found out about this match, because lord have mercy, twitter was losing its shit over it
what is it about women wielding deadly weapons that is insanely hot?
oh wait it’s because i’m gay
the ideal date is coming over to my house and staring at my wolf figurines in complete silence. if you touch any of them the date is over
did fitz write this