Imagine one of those vampires that spent a few decades napping and now they’re trying to catch up as best they can so they’re in a library looking through years of old magazines and overhear some middle-schooler discussing her project about the moon-landing and they’re like “WHAT!!!”
“You have to tell me everything about this!!!”
A confused but enthusiastic sixth-grader unfolds her trifold poster board and tells an absolutely captivated 3000 year old man-eater about the space race.
More like “I LITERALLY HAVENT EVEN GOTTEN THROUGH THE RECONSTRUCTION ERA PLEASE TAG SPOILERS”
I’M!!
“Have you gotten to Franz Ferdinand being shot yet?”
An Austrian Vampire, angrily looking up from a ninth-grade history book: “are you FUCKING KIDDING ME??”“yeah you know…lincoln doesnt get reelected”
Vampire: “well why NOT he seems perfectly capable and oooh…oh…”FRICK
I LOVE THIS SO MUCH
“So, you know pluto isn’t a planet, right?”
*Vampire chucks astronomy book written in 1994 at the person*
Imagine the vampire asking people who killed JFK and they’re all like ‘no one knows’ and the vampire just sighs and says ‘ok I know I said no spoilers but this is just getting ridiculous. someone tell me.”
imagine a vampire who’s absolutely mad about having missed a very specific moment and not really caring about the big picture searching for the one history nerd who might know when that outrageous lipstick they loved was put out of commerce, what happened to that minor theatre company debut, a forgetten artist’s they loved fate, if their friends ever did marry, what happened to that family lineage/where are the heirs now, /what happened to that one small hungarian village who was basically only some houses and mud where the heck did my village go/
this is my favorite vampire post
I love this on so many levels. Also @yetanotherramblingfangirl you need it.
Tag: funny
ghost in the house: GET OUT. I WILL TAKE YOU-
real estate agent: chill, its me.
ghost: oh hey. have you sold it yet.
real estate agent: obviously NOT, idiot.
I love how incredulous this is, daily mail readers must live in a constant state of amazement and bewilderment, it’s cute.
Daily Mail, I know your wording is supposed to scare and horrify me, but this is the cutest thing I have read today.
This is adorable, cute happy trans girl couple yay
Their just so terrified, it would be hilarious if they weren’t trying to kill us.
I was so amused by the cuteness I literally wasn’t even aware this was supposed to be scaremongering rather than celebration until someone pointed out this was Daily Mail.
well first of all every single mermaid in cinema is gay so jot that down
oh what you need those papers attached? yeah one sec lemme jusAAAAAAAAAAACHOMP THERE YOU GO CHARLES
Playful Pastry Chef Turns Ordinary Desserts Into Delightful Mini Scenes
Can I get the actual recipes tho????
this is making me so hungry right now
i have a deep respect for scotland because i was at an ireland vs scotland football match and their chant was “we hate england more than you”
one time at a germany vs scotland game some german fans started the “stand up if you hate england” chant and the whole stadium stood up
WHAT DID WE DO?!
What didn’t we do
Does this mean that England is the us of europe
where do you think the us got it from????
Where my introverts at?
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